Below are a few age-appropriate tips for talking with your kids about suicide to help you lead discussion.
Ages 3-7
Use simple words and reassure safety. Name feelings. For instance you might say, “You look sad. It’s okay to be sad.” Use books or play to help express emotions. Below is one example of what you might share:
“They were very sad, and their mind was sick. They made a choice that hurt their body, and they died. God loves them and us very much. It’s okay to feel sad and to ask God for help.”
Age 8-12
Be honest and calm, allowing questions. Explain that depression is an illness of the mind and heart, just like our bodies can get sick. Normalize counseling and prayer together. Below is one example of what you might share:
“They struggled with deep sadness and pain, and they didn’t know how to ask for help. God’s heart breaks with ours when we lose someone. We can talk to God about our sadness.”
Age 13-18
Be direct and open — teens sense avoidance. Use nonjudgmental language. Encourage both professional help and spiritual support. Below is one example of what you might share:
“Sometimes depression or hopelessness makes people believe there’s no way out. It’s not a lack of faith — it’s an illness that clouds judgment. We can grieve, trust God’s mercy, and make sure we always talk when we feel that low.”
Ultimately, you help your kids the most in these moments, though, by simply making yourself available. Start there. They will remember your presence more than your words.
Losing someone to suicide is deeply painful for the whole family. Parents often struggle to find the right words, but your presence matters far more than perfect answers. In these moments, your children need your steady love and honesty. They will remember how you showed up for them more than what you said.
Jesus Himself entered the depths of human pain. When your child faces sadness or loss, your calm and loving honesty helps them see the heart of God through you. “Blessed are those who mourn, for they will be comforted.” (Matthew 5:4).
Principles to Hold Before You Begin
Listen first, fix later.
Kids need to feel heard before they can receive comfort or direction. Research shows that empathy and validation matter more than quick solutions. (Child Mind Institute).
Name feelings simply.
Putting words to emotions helps reduce shame and confusion. Try: “You look sad — do you want to tell me more?” (Child Mind Institute).
Model calm confidence.
Children take emotional cues from you. Show that it’s okay to feel hard things and that help is available. (Child Mind Institute).
Keep faith real and accessible.
Faith offers language for hope and presence — not just a “fix.” Pair Scripture with practical care: medical help, therapy, rest, and routine.
Scriptures to Anchor Your Conversation
As parents and ministry leaders, emphasize God’s compassion, not condemnation.
Psalm 34:18 — “The Lord is close to the brokenhearted.”
Romans 8:38–39 — “Nothing can separate us from the love of God.”
John 10:10 — Jesus came to bring life and hope.
We can trust the same Jesus who wept over the death of his friend Lazarus also weeps with us and welcomes us in our pain. (John 11:35). Encourage prayer, journaling, and professional grief counseling — especially trauma-informed care for children.
Meeting Your Children at their Level